No Posts???

So I just noticed that none of my posts from this month actually. . .um. . .posted. Which is probably for the best, since some of them were posts you probably would not hav wanted to read.

To sum them up: Jess has been getting in touch with her naughty side, too much of a paycheck going toward alcohol, too many mornings waking up with strange men in the house, and too many bars.

And that paragraph sounded way worse than the earlier posts. Oh well, too much trouble to fix it.

A few updates of quick scenes from my school that help you see what it's like to teach in NYC:

Principal: Ms, may I speak to you for a moment?
Me: Sure. What's up?
Principal: I need you to rearrange your students based on Spanish speaking ability.
Me: Um. . .I already did that.
Principal: YOu only gave me four names to change. That's not enough.
Me: those are the only students who need to be changed to 801.
Principal: Find more students to change.
Me: Um. . .okay. . .

Ms. E: Excuse me. Excuse me, teacher!
Me: Yes?
Ms E: I need to borrow two of your students right now.
Me: They're taking a test. THey need to stay here.
Ms E: Only for a few minutes. Sade and Taray, come here.
Me: seethe. . .
TWO HOURS LATER
Me: Excuse me, Ms. E, I need to borrow three of your students.
MS E: I am in the middle of my class.
Me: This will just take a minute. Adam, Camelia, Jovan, I need to speak to you in the hall for a moment.
ACJ: What's up, miss?
Me: Nothing. Having fun in Ms. E's class?
ACJ: No. We hate her.
Me: Here, let's go get a drink from the pop machine downstairs.

Girls: OMG! Miss! Miss! Who's that in the hallway?
Me: That's Mr. Nerenberg. He teaches theater.
Girls: OMG, he looks like Patrick Dempsey.

Ms. M: Do you have kids, Ms. Delaney?
Me: Choking on sandwich. . .

Principal: I"ll be giving out professional period instructions. Ms. Delaney, you'll be a teacher mentor
Me: Um. . .it's my first year.
Principal: I'm aware that you are new to the school, but you're still one of our more veteran teachers.
Me: No. . .it's my first year. I've never taught. I'm supposed to GET a mentor, not be one.
Principal: Oh. Really?



But I love the kids, I love the staff, and I mostly like the job. So silly anecdotals like those above. . .they just ad to the charm, right?

Now, let's see if this one actually posts.

Guinea Pigs!

I got two guinea pigs, and they are ADORABLE. Elphy and Nessa. My roommate came up with the names. I give her props.

And nothing else is happening. I'm going to get a tattoo next weekend and I'm even more deeply in love with my happily married AP. Poo.

Moving in to October

Wow, is it really October already? Have I really be in NY for almost four months?
Wow.

Life's been getting better here as I've been making friends and finding the ins and outs of the area. Last weekend was. . .special. Went out Friday night with a bunch of the other young teachers from my school and. . .yeah, that's really all that needs to be said. Saturday I had a college board conference ALL DAY LONG, but it was okay, because I got to stare at my hot AP the entire time. I sat next to him. It was glorious.

Saturday night just barhopped a bit, and then Sunday went apple picking. Apple picking!

Also, I have decided that boys are the most confusing, overrated thing ever. And how do I keep finding ones that want to become priests?!?!?!?!?

And that is all that I really have to say. Except that I was disappointed by the Ugly Betty season premiere, enjoy the Office, and was pretty ambivalent toward Grey's Anatomy.

I suffer from a disease I like to call: I'm always tired.

Teaching is hard.Wow. It's fun, but it's hard. And exhausting. And sometimes, the only thing that I want to do is sleep. So I do.

That is my story. I wish that I had something more interesting to say. But I don't.

I'm also kind of hungry right now, so I think I'm going to go eat some ice cream. Because, clearly, that is the healthy thing to eat when one is hungry.

Hugs!
Jess

I'm Still Alive!

Hey! I may not update, but I'm still alive!

Number of people I'm in love with: 3
Number of students in love with me: 7
Number of men I'm in love with who are also in love with me: 0

Not bad statistics, all things considering.

(:

Better post later. Maybe.

I Heard It Through the Grapevine

Yes. . .this post had to be removed. . .sorry.

Now I Understand

why people like to teach. But only sometimes. Because, even though I'm teaching the same material to class after class, it really doesn't ever get boring. You're always on your toes, trying to keep a step ahead of the students. Plus, I'm teaching Spanish, which we all KNOW isn't my best subject, so I have to work just to make sure that I'm more competent than my students.

It's INCREDIBLY difficult. There are disciplinary problems here that I would never have even IMAGINED back in the suburbs. Also, there's no money, and it's really hard to accept sometimes. I have one class in which there aren't enough chairs for all of my students, and six of them have to stand in the back, or sit on the radiator. ALl in all the Spanish department has 100 books, while we have almost 400 students. We can't ever ask students to bring materials to class, because they can't afford them. And TVs for the classrooms? Don't make me laugh.

Also, it's tragic how undereducated some of my students are. Some of them can barely spell--remember that I teach high school and middle school. At least I'm teaching introductory Spanish, so they shouldn't HAVE to be overly literate.

My largest class, of 34 students, has 8 students who are completely literate, while the rest know nothing about spanish. So, in effect, it is now two classes going on at once, both begging for my attention at all time.

And there's one young lady who doesn't speak any English. This, of course, is not overly difficult for her in my class, but we don't have an ESL program, and it's killing me to imagine this poor girl in class every day without the ability to understand what her teachers are saying.

At the same time, it's always engaging, and so many of the kids are so wonderful. It's amazing how quickly you can fall in love with these little mini-people--and this is coming from me, who has always claimed to dislike kids.

I think I"m getting the hang of it now, though. Maybe. I guess that I'll find out next week, when regular schedule's kick in and I have to do content classes every day of every week. But for now, I'm golden, for now, I'm doing all right. For now.

J

My Friends Suck

Why do my friends suck? Because those with blogs never update. I ask you this, oh faithful reader (if you exist) why have a blog if it is never updated? Update, my lovelies, update so that I may know that you live on!

Got my computer back. Let's see, how can I sum up these past few weeks. . .in a quickchat!

*Fell in love three times
1) With my A.P.
2) With the firefighter across the street
3)With Beef, a HUGEASS bulldog.
*Finished 3 novels (Reading Lolita in Tehran, Gilead, Call It Sleep)
*Saw Nanny Diaries (not worth it)
*Discovered that every episode of the 90s cartoon of the X-Men is on youtube and have been obsessively watching them (hear that, Lyds?)
*Fell in love one more time, with CJ from Top Chef
*Attended lots of professional development

And tomorrow is my first day of teaching. To say that I'm terrified would be an understatment. Actually, I"m not terrified yet, but I'm anticipating that I will be terrified. I'll be kind of disappointed if I'm not, since everyone else around here is having panic attacks. I don't want to be left out!

Urm. . .that's about it. My new goal is to read every Pulitzer Prize Winning book ever written. So far I think I"ve finished 8. So. . .I have a lot to go.

Also, HBO rocks.

Signing out, chickadees!

J

September Is Here

Number one: My computer is back!

Number two: Updated more Witch Story

Number Three: Better, more significant and meaningful blog entry to come

Meanwhile: Enjoy this song I wrote for "Circular Tracks: The Musical"

Chorus:
September is here
leaves brightly falling
breeze quickly blowing
autumn’s enthralling
teacher’s cajoling
September’s here!

Jessamyn:
It’s time to grab a rifle
take to woods and take to strife
time to grab some gun and powder
time to take away a life
it’s time to wander through the forests
time to prove now my own worth
it’s time to live
it’s time to die
it’s time to give
it’s time to cry
that september is here!

Meghan:
And it is time to hit the books
time to take on all that learning
it is time to pound my brain
time to get those juices churning
time to prove now my own worth
it’s time to read
it’s time to write
it’s time to lead
time for delight
September is here!

Chorus:
September is here
leaves brightly falling
breeze quickly blowing
autumn’s enthralling
teacher’s cajoling
September’s here!

Jessamyn
They say I’m a girl

Meghan
They speak the truth

Jessamyn
They say that I’m weak

Meghan
Now that’s uncouth

Jessamyn
They say that I cannot stand
on my two feet
they say I can’t succeed

Meghan
they push you down
I pull you up
they say you can’t

Jessamyn
Well I say I can

Meghan
And I say you can

Jessamyn
And I say I can

Both
Let’s say we can
In September we can

Jessamyn Meghan
How I love the blood red leaves

Meghan
How I love the faded pages
How I love the covers and greaves

Jessamyn
How I love the beasts out of cages

Both
How I love to break away
from a family that’s insane
In September I can

Chorus
September is here
leaves brightly falling
breeze quickly blowing
autumn’s enthralling
teacher’s cajoling
September’s here!
Jessamyn
September is here Take to the woods
Leaves brightly falling Become a man
Breeze quickly blowing Meghan
Autumn's enthralling Heading back to school
Teacher's cajoling Become a woman
September is here!

Gavin
Time to find a wife

Chorus
September is here!

Gavin
Time to take her life

Chorus
September is here!

Gavin
Time to have it all

Chorus
September is here!

Gavin
Time to watch her fall

Chorus
September is here!

All
September is here!
Leaves brightly falling
breeze quickly blowing
autumn's enthralling
teachers' cajolling
September is here!



is hereleaves brightly fallingbreeze quickly blowingautumn’s enthrallingteacher’s cajolingSeptember’s here!

Bit of a Hiatus, folks

All right, so I already explained the computer situation. Basically, I apologize, but I won't be posting anything for at least a week, until I get my fixed computer back. It's just not worth it to come into the lab to type up info for y'all. I still check email, if you want to contact me that way, or there's always, of course, the phone.

Stay well (even without your semi-daily update of Jessness!)

Pickles,
J

Why Technology is Satan

except not actually Satan, because Satan is hot and sexy and technology sux balls.

So, yesterday was a crazy, crazy day. I needed to submit my Transitional B certificate, turn in my Americorps application, and make it to work by 12 (which I failed at, by the way). However, my passport was awol, so the morning was spent with me frantically running through the house looking for my passport. I left my computer on my bed, found the passport, and went skipping off to the city/work/whatever life may hold.

Return home and. . .lo and behold. . .my computer doesn't work! In fact, there's a huge crack across my screen. Heinous!!!! And, because it's obviously outside damage (despite the fact that I have NO idea how it got damaged. . .it was working before I left, and then, I returned, and voila, nada.

Luckily the harddrive isn't damaged (I don't think!) or anything like that, so it should be fine, after the screen is fixed. . .which is going to cost upwards of $300. . .money which I don't really have now, but. . .well. c'est la vie, right?

In happier news. . .well, there really isn't any happier news. Eventually I'll start getting paid, that's semi-happy news, right?

My apologies, I'm in a bit of a bad mood at the moment (which I think SHOULD be understandable!) So I'll just sign out and let y'all get back to your happy lives.

And yes, Ames, this means there won't be any WS updated for several weeks because. . .my computer is broken.

J

It Just Don't Get Much Better Than This

Lounging around at home, reading books, enjoying the rain/sunshine (yes, Michigan is indeed a schizophrenic, PMSing woman) and writing. I'm catching up on some of the stories I'd been working on--and, yes, Ames, I'll put them online, I just want to get a few more chapters written. Then I'll string 'em out a bit, so you can keep enjoying the threads long after I am gone.

Today I made chicken/potato salad. I realized as an afterthought that I should hav eben German potato salad instead of American, but whatev, mayo is the way to go. Just ask the Europeans! (right, KT, haha)

Um, I have nothing more to say, I was just idling around people's blogs, and nobody's updated for a while, and I realized that I was a hypocrite to complain as I hadn't updated in a while, so now that I have, I can complain that no one else has. You lazy bums!

Hmmm, what a waste of a post. My apology I have no deep or dark advice for y'all, though I've been reading Phillip Pullman's Dark Materials stories, and they veyr much intrigue me, as they are a bit of theft from Mr. C.S. Lewis, John Milton, hte Bible, and some cracked-out version of his own mentality.

Have I mentioned that I love Satan?

Bunnies
J

To Be or Not To Be

a Slut.

And for the very first time, I found myself considering this question. So here's the scene. . .a bunch of my friends I head into Manhattan. It's Thursday night. Our program has just ended. I don't have to return to work until 11 the next morning. So there we are, in Manhattan, watching a bunch of Mexicans at a concert followed by dancing, etc. Followed by us heading to the skivviest bar possible.

And there I ran into a bunch of British guys. The rest of the group is setting at a table, I head to the bar to get a drink, and somehow end up discussing rugby, football, politics, etc. ANd one guy is a complete ass. Check out this conversation.

Him: So, you got a boyfriend?
Me: No, not at the moment.
Him: When did you last go out with him?
Me: Urm. . .about two months ago (true! Last time I was on a date! Two months ago, give or take)
Him: Oh, great.
Me: What do you mean, great?
Him: that means you're still in the angry, slut stage, when you jump into bed with any guy you meet.

Yeah. That's exactly how it went. DISGUSTING.

But, one of the others was cute. I mean, really cute. About a half foot taller than me, broad shoulders, short brown hair, BEAUTIFUL green eyes, a sexy little scar above one eye. . .oh my goodness. Beautiful accent, smart

Anyway. I'll stop drooling. Gist of the story is that he invited me back to his place, and I actually considered it. Just for half a second, no more, just enough time for it to flit through my head before laughing it off, but. . .oh my, he was beautiful. But he was just passing through, so it would be

Anyway. That's enough. I just thought I would put this up to let everyone know that yes, even goody-good girls like me have dirty thoughts every now or then. And man, he was FINE.

J

Michigan I-O

Did anyone else have to sing that song in elementary school? I've always had a sneaking suspicion that my principal invented it, so I' m still trying to find out. . .

My colleagues at school are CRAZY. Seriously, they're fifth graders. Except for my Spanish lead teacher, who I LOVE, which is good because otherwise. . .I might shoot myself. And I'm in love with the AP in charge of discipline. Which I may have mentioned, but I'm mentioning it again anyway, because love is a beautiful thing.

I'm going to teaching conferences, eating amazing catered food, and getting paid. Much better than the actual teaching aspect of the job.

Also, my program ends on Friday which means . . .FREEDOM. Which, apparently, also equates to me coming back to Michigan. I want to see lots and lots of people, because I probably won't be home again until Christmas, which means I still won't see many people, since Christmas is family time. So squeeze it in now, people.

Urm. . .that's about it. I get a $1500 check tomorrow, which is good, because I'm as broke as I've been in years. YEARS I tell you.

And. . .that's really all that I have to say. How pathetic. I'm living in the City that Never Sleep, and I have nothing terribly interesting to say. Oh, except that my students got in a fight over whether I look more like J.Lo or Madonna. Apparently those are the only white celebrities the kids know, so I must look like one of them. Which is fine with me, they're both hot.

Also, anyone in A2 want to go to the outlet mall? because I need new clothes like WHOA.

Okay, this time I really am signing off, as I have to get headed off to my LAST TRAINING WORKSHOP. Which will be followed by PARTY. Which will be followed by SLEEP. Which will be followed by MONEY. WHich will be followed by TRAINING AND SCRUMPTIOUS FOOD. Which will be followed by PARTY. WHich will be followed by SLEEP. WHich will be followed by PLANE RIDE HOME.

And if that wasn't the most obnoxious entry ever, I don't know what was.

Hugs and monkeys,
J

Good Morning Baltimore

Good night New York.

I went and saw Hairspray last night. For an hour and a half I was beside myself during the movie, laughing, giggling, singing along at little snatches. The Broadway music is definitely infectious, and the characters sparkled with that overly brushed, white-toothed cleanliness.

Very basic plot summary for those who don't know: Tracy Turnblad is a plump teengaer who loves to dance and wants to appear on the Corny Collins Show (A kind of American Bandstand). But, of course, she's fat, so she can't. After getting kicked off the show she runs into some of the dancers from theshow's Negro Day -- the one day a month that black dancers are featured on the show. She takes up the cause of integration and fights for integrated tv.

Overall the movie is bubbly cute, a little low on content, but worth it for the flying zingers, the bright colors, the dancing, and, as already said, the infectious, guilty pleasure charm of the young stars. The pain and shot to the heart (You give love a bad name!) comes at hte end, when the goal is achieved and there is integration.

Everybody cheers for it. The black people cheer. THe white people cheer. I'm sure that the conspicuously missing Hispanics, Asians, and Indians are also cheering. And as I was watching this triumphant homage to integration I suddenly wanted to stand up and walk out. Because there isn't any triumph yet.

I wanted to yell--have you actually BEEN to Baltimore? Or, even more, have you been to New York? I went into Manhattan yesterday and was literally shocked by how many white people there were. The subway down is a shifting prism of color, beginning with blacks, followed by the ligter tones of the HIspanics, and by the time you've reached Wall Street only the palest of white skin remains.

Ours is not an integrated country. We live in a system of classes that every day is widening more and more. And, as every year passes, as every group of suburban children graduates with the idea that racism is a thing of the past and that we are all equal, it becomes even more pronounced. The middle class is disappearing, the one arena in which races could mingle comfortably. And it's disappearing.

Is it race? Is it merely socio-economic circumstances? Why do the two so often go hand in hand? It's difficult to watch a show like Hairspray with the cheering for integration and then to go to a school that is 60% black, 40% HIspanic. Then to return home to a better funded school (almost $2000 more dollars per child) that is 95% white. You can't justify that to me. It's impossible.

So I still recommend the movie, I still love the movie, I still fully plan on buying the movie when it comes out on DVD. I just may not ever be able to watch the entire thing. Because it's a lie, an the fact that it's bright, bubbly, well-packaged and shiny makes it worse. The fact that it's taken for granted makes it worse.

Shameless Spoilers

That's right, you have been warned. I finished reading the final harry Potter book about an hour ago, and as none of my friends/housemates up here are finished yet, I am still busting to talk about it thus. . .online blog. So if you have not finished (or, heaven forbid, started!) yet, and don't want anything spoiled, I encourage you to visit this page at a later date.

There. That's out of the way. Overall, I am rather conflicted about this book. It is a marked departure from the tone of the earlier books; much more serious, with a good bit of the wit and good humor missing. It's not necessarily darker. . .just more prosaic and run of the mill (though any time the twins appear, it takes a much-needed jolt of good feeling).

With the darker theme (basically impending war/death) it would be expected that Rowling would up the stakes. After all, there has been a progressive darkening from the first book, when the worst thing to happen was Ron being knocked out, to the second with involved students being Petrified and Ginny being kidnapped, to the third which dealt with court-ordered deaths and Ron's more serious injuries, onto the third with the first true death (granted, Cedric Diggory, a character just barely introduced before the book and not given a great deal of face time anyway) to Sirius Black, to Dumbledore himself. In this book, who dies? A professor nobody knew existed, Tonks' father, who nobody knew existed, Tonks, who has had maybe twenty lines throughout the books, Lupin who only recently reappeared, Mad-Eye, who was forgotten as soon as he died, and Fred. Okay, yes, Fred's death was sad, but it was overshadowed by Harry's attack and the reunion with Percy.

Yes, loose ends were tied up, but almost too many. Victor Krum coming to the wedding? Snape's nauseating crush on Lily Evans? Dudley Dursley suddenly LIKING Harry? Dumbledore's suddenly revealed sleezy past? The simple truth is that more detail was added than needed, in time that could have been spent enjoying the characters we all know and love.

Perhaps that is what is most irking about the book--the fact that it is almost exclusively Harry, Ron, and Hermione. Granted, they are the main characters and the favorites, but what about all of those other characters who have featured so predominantly in the other books? The teacher's at Hogwarts, who don't appear until the last hundred pages, Neville, Luna, Draco. . .or what about Ginny? Poor Ginny, who's name is thrown in almost haphazardly every 50 pages or so to remind the reader that, yes, Harry still loves her, though by the end of the book it's been eight months between the last time he saw her. In the first six books the trio wer eharangued by others who constantly got in the way and tried to help. Dumbledore, of course, wa sthe primary interference, but others got in the way and helped as well. The first book there was Hagrid, Snape, McGonagall, Dumbledore, Quirrel. The second had DD, Hagrid, and Gilderoy all mucking things up (and let's not forget Moaning Myrtle, as Rowling clearly did). In the third the Marauders made their glorious entrance and suddenly Sirius and Lupin joined those irksome adults who want to help. The fourth book everyone was in on the action, and the Order appeared in the fifth and through the sixth. Yet suddenly, in this final installment, everyone is content to let Harry, Hermione, and Ron wander off. I don't believe it. Not foran instant.

Or the fact that Ron, who has displayed one great skill and one skill only throughout the books--tactical ability, as shown in Wizard's Chess--suddenly can throw his voice, cast magic easily, apparate in teh most stressful of situations, hold himself against incredibly strong wizards and, best of all, can mimic Parseltongue. What's with that? Or Hermione wandering around crying every four minutes.

Romance doesn't really belong in these books. Hermione an Ron's bickering worked well. Harry's infatuations worked well. A prolonged love for a girl he hasn't even seen in eight monhs. . .yeah, it doesn't really work. Ron's compliments and one-handed hugs at the beginning o the book. . .a bit heavy-handed. And let's not even get into that passage in the middle of the book when it turned all Star Wars! (Rememer Han Solo asked LEia if she'd rather be with Luke, he's the hero. . .yeah, sound familiar?)

There were, of course, joyous and exciting moments of character development. Narcissa and LUcius' decay as Death Eaters and displayed affection for their son was believable and enjoyable. Percy's return to the Weasley clan, though expected, was pleasant, if rushed. And, of course, Molly Weasley was FANTASTIC at the end. Haven't we all been waiting forsome crazy Molly?

And, as always, it was possible for the reader to stay one step ahead of the game, which always makes or good reading, sitting there going "no, Harry, don't you get it, don't you GET IT?" Yes. I enjoyed that. And being able to yell "I was right! I was right!"

But frankly, a the end, the sacrifice didn't seem enough. The "shocking" deaths of Lupin, Tonks, and Fred? Not so much. I've been predicting a Weasley twin death since the fourth book! And, isn't it curious that not a single character from Harry's year died? All those memebers of the DA, and they all made it through? Snape as the only teacher to die? I mean, seriously, COME ON.

Some characters, who could easily have been left out, were pulled in at the last moment. Krum and Dobby most noticeably. Some didn't get the attention they deserved. IN a shout-out to the movies, Oliver Wood reappeared. And yes, Harry was the final Horcrux, and who didn't see that coming?

But I think I could have handled all of that (though disappointed by the lack of a primary character death--seriously, it's a war! And they ALL lived???? Harry, Ron, Hermione, Luna, Neville, and Ginny ALL lived?????? I'll even throw Hagrid and Malfoy in for good order. . ALL of them???) if it weren't for the epilogue. I hate the epilogue. I wish the epilogue didn't exist. And now I'm just waiting for how long it takes before someone writes "Hogwarts, the Next Generation" starring Jame, Albus, and Rose, with Scorpius as the whiny bitch at school.

Groan.

Overall, it was obviously a good read. I mean, I finished it in 12 hours. I kept going, even when it got annoying. It was just overdone, and a bit of a sell-out. And yes, I really, really wanted ROn to die. But, if you look at my predictions, you'll notice that's the only one that's really off. The rest? Yeah, I did all right.

OKay, that's it for now, hope you all enjoyed the book, I did, despite my many complaints as written here. ('ere, 'ere!)

-J

I'm in Love

with the New York Times.

This is the most sinister, evil, fantastic newspaper in the world. So, seven years ago, when every New York Regents' Test was stolen and there was a city-wide cheating scandal, the Times got a copy of the test answers before it was released and printed it as front page news. Just to prove that they could.

Wednesday they posted an online review of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Just to prove that they could.

Mmmmm. . .must work for demonic, hellish newspaper. . .yes. . .

Well, that's in direct contrast to my current job, isn't it?

Harry Potter, among other things

Went and saw the 5th movie last night, which was actually phenomenal. I was suitably impressed. It was extremely dark, and I think that it cut more out of the book than any other movies. What it did well--it finally got the characters right. I think that Ron only have about three lines for the entire picture, but they were RIGHT. He was clueless, daft, and clumsy. . .but also incredibly brave and loyal. Ron of the movies finally matched Ron of my imagination! Yea! In addition, the romance wasn't overdone for once. . .just a few hints here and there. And Cedric was in it a bit. . yea for eye candy. The movies must be getting harder and harder to make, though. . .more characters, more action, less time. . .props to all of the writers.

Um. . .there was something else to add, but I don't remember. Anyway, I recommend the movie. Also, it has me really excited for the new book. So, on a note unrelated to my other posts, my predictions for the final book!

First off, neither Snape nor Malfoy will remain "evil." Snape will ultimately save Harry, and Malfoy will snivel around and be incapable of killing people that he's supposed to kill.

Ron and Hermione will get together in an incredibly awkward way.

Ginny will lead Hogwarts students in a rebellion while Harry, Hermione, and Ron take on Voldemort.

Ginny will once again demonstrate that she is one of the strongest wizards ever.

The Marauders will meet again, as Lupin finds himself in some manner of incredibly dangerous situation.

Peter Pettigrew will ultimately die, but helping Harry instead of Voldemort.

Dumbledore will be in it plenty, through Pensieve and portraits.

Bill and FLeur's wedding will NOT go off as planned.

Neville will face down VOldemort, and while he won't be killed, his friends will assume that he has been.

Final face-offs will be: Voldemort v. Harry, Bellatrix v. Hermione, and Lucius v. Ron.

Ron will die. Yes, I am upset at this, but I still believe it quite firmly.

Hagrid is also at danger of death, though his is not guaranteed.

The Ministry will appoint a new Headmaster instead of putting McGonagall in charge.

Voldemort will cast Avada Kedavra, but it won't kill Harry--again. When the battle is over, Harry will no longer have a scar.

Petunia will play a large role. I'm not sure what yet. . .sorry, I kind of fail on that front.

There will be an epilogue, but it won't be from the point of view of the main characters.

H,R, and H will return to Hogwarts for school.

We will see some old friends from Beauxbatons and Durmstrang again. Lavender will finally grow a pair and do something decently heroic.

The end of the final battle will mirror the first book--Hermione providing the brains to get Harry through, but unable to follow, and Ron "sacrificing the queen." His chess skills will come in again.

Also, has anyone ever noticed how much the four main students resemble the original founders? Malfoy Slytherin, Hermione Ravenclaw, Ron Hufflepuff and Harry Gryffindor? I just find that interesting. It has nothing to do with anything else.

All right, signing out, and promise not to mock me too much if I'm totally off when the book comes out on --squee--Saturday!!!!

Social Inequity

"Savage Inequalities" by Jonathan Kozol. Go out, buy it, read it. All of Kozol's books are great, but this one in particular is interesting because it hits on so many different cities.

It's just not right, how different school experiences are for people. It's not right that where I went to school we had a great media center, televisions in every room, desks, clean restrooms, extra curricular programs, and great sports facilities while some schools here don't even have cafeterias. It's not right that we took a bus every day and some of these kids have to walk 5 milesa day because they can't afford trasnporation. It's not right that I knew I could go to college from kindergarten and some of these people can never even imagine that as a possibility.

I'm looking into other volunteer opportunities around here as well. I just feel like I'm not doing enough, like being involved in education isn't enough. This is where it has to start, I KNOW that, but. . .but sometimes it feels like I'm not doing anything new, like I'm just filling a hole that anyone could fill. And I guess that's not the case, but still. . .

Feeling very frustrated overal right now. It seems like the older I get the more inequalities I'm able to see in our country, and the less I'm able to affect change.

On a happier front, I'm making friends, going out, seeing the city, and my life right now is pretty great. Which just makes me feel more awful about these poor kids. So that's that. And I"m relaly glad I saved so much money in college, because now I'm not stressing about my funds like everyone else.

Sigh. Oh, and if you post a comment and dont' sign in. . .sign a name. I'm talking to you, anonymous!

Love
J

Whoot!

Got my phone back. So y'all can call me again. I know you want to.

Still have glass in my feet, though.

-J

I'm Not A Whiny Bitch, I Swear!

I just realized that my last post kind of seemed like a plea for comments. So not the case. What I really meant was that occassionally a comment, here or there--every entry isn't needed, and that one in particular isn't needed.

Anyway. Life is shit right now. Last night I lost my cell phone. And by lost, I mean seriously lost. I've misplaced my phone before, and I've lost it, while knowing EXACTLY where it was, but right now. . .I don't know where it is. So that is totally not cool, especially since I JUST bought one two weeks ago.

Also, I stepped on a chunk of glass, and I got the big part out, but I think I still have some in my foot, because there is piercing pain. So. . .no phone, and a broken foot.

AND. My teacher is gone. The teacher I am supposed to be observing and learning from. Instead, now I am on my own. With crazy summer school kids who don't respect me or anything. It's the most frustrating, dificult thing that I have ever done in my entire life. It's VERY rewarding, though, especially with the really smart kids. And now for tomorrow I'm trying to differentiate my instruction so that the bright kids can no longer be so infernally BORED all the time.

And the heat index is well over 100. I think I'm dying.

Did I mention that there's a shard of glass in my foot?

-J

Woodlawn Weekend

It was quite a weekend, let me tell you. First off. I spent. Friday night. In Trump Towers. In a penthouse.

I just reread that sentence, and realized that it sounds a bit different than the actual experience. A friend of a friend was having a party in the Towers, and invited a friend who then invited me. Trump Towers penthouse is AMAZING. On one side of the house you could see the UN building and the river, out another window the Brooklyn bridge, and out another the Eiffle Tower and Chrysler buildings. Can you say wow?

Also went to a play and Ikea. NOt as exciting.

And now I have loads of homework which I really ought to be doing, but I felt bad that I hadn't written. Also--I know many of you have told me that you read this but never comment, but you know, a comment or two here or there would not be amiss. In fact, they would be quite apprecitaed. In other words. . .please, please comment!

Lots of lvoe,
J

A Barnes and Noble coffee cup

I'm drinking out of one, and it makes me very happy. What makes me even happier is that I can identify all of the writers on the cup.

To share a "happy" anecdote of today: UofM has serious issues with getting diplomas to people, so that I was unable to prove my graduation to the NYCTF. Thus, I did not get my stipend check. So I rode the train down to Brooklyn to "explain" my situation to the people there. They were very unsympathetic. I then rode the train an hour back to the Bronx, only to discover that I have somehow lost my school id. WHich costs $40. Which I can't afford without the stipend check. Ah, in what a vicious cycle we live.

In other news. . .well, I don't really have any other news. Just kind of chilling, taking easy classes, going to summer school in the morning where I try to maintain my distance. These are, after all, the kids I will be teaching next year, and as I haven't yet decided my classroom goals or curriculum, I really don't want them to have an opinion of me coming in. So I sit silently in the back and take lots of notes. My hope is that this makes the kids think that I am a silent observer of another teacher, evaluating her and the class. I actually think the kids think I"m an idiot who can't pass 7th grade English Language Arts, and am thus taking the course over again with them. Ah, well, que sera sera and c'est la vie and all of that.

It rained yesterday (4th of July) thus no fireworks. Watched "when Harry Met Sally" instead. Very cute movie, highly recommended, and no, I don't know how I'd never seen it before.

I want to hug all of the diversity in New YOrk. I have also come up with a new life goal: live for a period of 1-2 years minimum in the 10 greatest cities in the world, as measured by population, culture, and famosity (I made that word up!) I haven't quite figured out what the greatest 10 cities in the world are, however. I think:

Hong Kong
New York City
Mexico City
Paris
London
That big city in Japan that I'm blanking on
Cairo
L.A.
That big city in India that I can only think of Baghdad and Bombay and it's something else
Taijet, Bhutan. Which is actually tiny, but only 250 extranjeros are allowed in a year, so I feel like it should count.

Yea lists!

Brazos y besos,
J

A Room With A View

Okay, well, actually that's not true at all. My room does not have a view. Unles you count that as being a view into my next door neighbor's living room. Which, to my mind, counts as not having a view at all.

Nonetheless, I have moved in, finally. I have my own bed, dressers with drawers, and massive bookcases that actually house all of my books! I will now be able to being calling people to chat without being rude and talking in front of people. I will be able to get online on a regular basis, to watch tv, to go for walks and runs and live a normal life. I know that this doesn't sound incredily exciting, but it is. I have to go shopping and get soap, towels, food, etc., but for the moment at least I have somewhere to live.

My room is tiny, very very tiny. I have a bed and two dressers, and honestly couldn't fit aything else. If someone wants to come and visit, they either have to sleep in the living room on the sleeper sofa, or curled into a ball on my hardwood floor. Or, what I recommend, make a real visit out of it, and stay at a New York hostel in Manhattan. Personal recommendations. Also, there are huge bookshelves in my room, so it's like a dream room for me, with all of my books within easy reach, and plenty of room to get more. Oh, I'm in love.

I begin student teaching tomorrow, and I'm mildly terrified. I'll be teaching in an English language classroom, at least, so that much will be nice. And then it's just the month of July, one month, and then I'm free, free, free for two weeks. So, look forward to seeing me, all of those of you who live in A2 or GRap. Yes, Gen, it looks like your prediction may be true and I may be back in Collegetown before spring break. Thank goodness, because I miss all of you!

So give me a call sometime, let me know how your life is, etc. etc. Until then, I am happily unpacking and getting used to living in a brand new place. I love you all!

-J

New York, New York, It's a Helluva Town

Wow. New York = Crazy.

First off, graduate classes here are very similar to high school. We do a lot of ungraded work, we "work together in groups" and we have projects instead of papers and quizzes. I'm not complaining. If anyone wants to breeze through graduate school, I highly recommend the CUNY system. If you want a legitimately good education, however, perhaps you would be best served by going elsewhere.

I have the same group of about 20 kids in both of my classes, which is fine since I like all of them. There's one other group of Spanish fellows up here, and I really dislike about half of them, so I guess that I got lucky to be in the class that I am. I have one psych class, one spanish ed class, and one Teaching Fellows class (the biggest joke of them all).

Second off, my job rocks. I will be working at a 6-12 building, teaching Spanish to 8/9. THe school is allied with the College Board, which means it's a highly preparatory school, lots of AP, and it gets lots of money funneled in through the College Board. Fantastic. Some of the kids are rough, but a lot of them are dedicated. My eighth grade should be good--the middle schoolers have to interview to be accepted in to the program, show good grades, etc. My 9th graders could be a challenge--they come from anywhere and everywhere. The teacher is pretty cool. I also get to design one class of my own, so I'm going to do a Speech class first semester, and then second semester offer it again along with a competitive Forensics team. I'm pretty pumped about that.

Finally, New York City. Honestly, I've been so exhausted from class that I haven't done much over the week. WE leave for class at 7 am, and don't get home until 7 or 8, and then we have a bit of homework, must search out dinner, etc. Friday I went out with a friend from the program. Originally we planned for an easy night--we'd see a movie, maybe get ice cream or something, go home. But one of her friends from the area called in the middle of the movie (Evan Almighty, which I liked better than Bruce Almighy, but maybe that's just because I adore Steve Carell) and invited us to the Village for drinks. So we went out with him and his gorgeous Brazilian roommate. And we went around. And around. And around. And I came home at 6 am, which I have NEVER done before (in memory). And then, as you know, I cannot sleep in, so I woke up at nine.

Anyway, there are a billion things to do in NY, but nothing is free. Except drinking, because guys here will buy any girl anything she wants. Which is really kind of sad. My goal is to find free things to do, and dorky friends to do them with. Wish me luck. Because neither my wallet nor my not-delicate figure can handle nights upon nights of boozin

Later, gatorz
J

I Got A Job!

Yes, this whole "every other post will be a book review" is failing madly. My most profound apologies.

Buuuuuuuutttt.t . .I got offered a job today! My first real, post-college, career-bound job, teaching High School Spanish in the South Bronx.

I move into my sublet tomorrow. Whooot.

And I start classes tomorrow. I'me xhausted, sweaty, and a job peed on my feet.

Taking A Bite Out of the Big Apple

Well, I'm here now, officially and permanently. New York, the City that Never Sleeps (actually, that might be Las Vegas or something, though it certainly applies here as well). Let me tell you one thing--it's stressful.

Of course, that is mostly due to the fact that I still have nowhere to live. Not entirely true: I have a lease starting July 1, it's just the interim with which I struggle. At the moment I am holed up in a friend's apartment, which is fine, but overall an inconvenience for her, and I feel slightly terrible about it. Tomorrow I go and check out a few sublets that have gotten in contact with me.

Two interviews Monday morning and the beginning of classes Tuesday. I still haven't decided how I feel about everything. I almost cried at the airport today, which would have been a first for me. It's just difficult to deal with a permanent move away. I don't live in Grand Rapids anymore--that isn't my home at all. And it's not like going to school, when I know that I'll be home for breaks, and when summers (potentially) would include home visits. I'm gone, far away, and suddenly getting back to my family is either a $300 flight or a twelve hour drive.

And a career. Frightening thought. Not just a job ordering around freshman and occassionally deep frying potatoes, but a real career complete with benefits, a union, and a salary. I think I'm ready for that. I'm just not sure I"m ready for everything else.

Except that everything else isn't anything new. I've lived with roommates before, in a city away from home. I've taken college classes. I've paid bills and rent. So why does this feel different?

And that, I think, is the New York experience. This city is unlike anything I've ever experienced. It's a city of strangers, which both fascinates and repels me. There's no connection here, and yet, at the same time, there is this great feeling of togetherness. We are separate yet we are one, and yes, I know how cheesy that sounds.

It's so big, and so overwhelming in many ways, yet also very accessible. I think it's mostly the division of wealth that drives me crazy. That I will stand on the subway beside a Hispanic construction worker from Queens, a black businessman from Brooklyn, a white thespian from Manhattan, and a black/hispanic family from the Bronx. On the subway everyone is equal, but the further into Manhattan you go the more white people are on the train, while the further into the Bronx the deeper the skin color gets.

It's annoying and it's irritating, and it's wrong. And what is worse, anyone that I've spoken with from my socio-economic status (ie white, upper middle class) always goes "well, things are gentrifying, it's getting better, but it's still not safe" as though race is the determining factor. There's something so wrong about the way Manhattanites are willing to believe theirs is the only part of the city that counts.

Also, air pollution. Bad. I miss fresh air, and I've only been here a few hours.

We'll see how things go when I start school, and move to my permanent place. Our apartment in Woodlawn is adorable--an Irish-Italian Catholic neighborhood (I should fit right in!) with plenty of trees and small stores. And, in theory at least, my work could be incredibly fulfilling--helping to erase the academic divide, etc. But here's the truth--I don't think I will ever be a New Yorker. Maybe, anything is possible, maybe I will come to love the city, but I find that difficult to believe. I find it more likely that I will finish the program, and then promptly move back to Michigan. Detroit maybe, or even Grand Rapids (ehhhhh). Or maybe Washington DC.

That's what she said. Or, that's what I say, and there's nothing more to it, really. Next post, in theory, should be a book review. Perhaps Little Children.

-J

Two In One Day????

Hello again,

I know, two in one day, I'm a mad narcissist. But I wanted to write about my recent journey to NYC.

I am completely divided on whether I like/love/hate the city. Never have I been to a place so segregated, and seemingly so voluntarily. Never have I seen such disparate display of wealth. Yet at the same time there is so much life to the city. You're never alone, no matter what time you're out, or where.

And, I've got to say: Times Square is pretty much the coolest place in the world, and Central Park is definitely one of the prettiest.

Nonetheless, these are tiny little stretches in a huge city. It's hard to take the subway and see white businessmen from the Financial District sitting next to hispanic unemployed men from the Bronx, knowing that this is the only (non) interaction they'll ever have. Supposedly the city is gentrifying, but it's hard to believe that. You ride the subway from Brooklyn to the Bronx and the clientele completely changes.

I can't stand the fact that on Lexington and 2nd Avenue there's a Vera Wang store, and on 169th and Fulton there isn't even a Dunkin Donuts. Sorry, there's some problems there, my people.

One of the schools I interviewed at I really liked. It's working with the College Board and is pretty hard core. I'd love to work there, but they're interviewing about a bajillion people, so I'm not so sure that the odds are in my favor. Oh well.

Anyway, I guess I'm not that inspired to write about NY. I thought I was, while I was there, anyway, but now. . .not so much. So. . .short post! Yea! Get back to your lives! The weather is beautiful, what are you doing on yours bums reading about me?

-J

Back from hiatus

Hello, all of my loyal readers and fans. I apologize for the long hiatus. And now, for the promised book review.

A Long Way Down
By Nicolas Hornby

Mr. Hornby is known, of course, for his sympathetic portrayals of somewhat seedy characters, his emphasis on light, satirical humor, and, of course, the propensity with which his novels are made into movies. It would not, then, be at all surprising to me if this piece were also converted into the film medium.

I would like to begin by mentioning that this book is identical to Bridge Club Thursdays--Amy, at least, would recognize this. Beside the point.

The novel focuses upon four characters, all of whom meet on a London rooftop while contemplating suicide. One is a middle aged woman, trapped in a life that bores her, with a son in a vegetative state since birth. One is a fallen media icon, an early morning talk show host who engaged in sexual activities with a minor and has since lost job, family, and respect. One is an American musician, finally facing the fact that he lacks either the talent or the resources to become a successful artist, and the final main character is a rebellious teenager with quicksilver moods and a slightly psychotic temperament.

Of course the characters do not jump, and the book chronicles the myriad ways in which they try to get their lives back on track. Amusing at times, poignant at others, A Long Way Down does not delve terribly deeply into the character's psyches, but provides a slight gloss which makes for enjoyable reading, if not terribly enlightening.

The greatest strengths, as ever, are Hornby's ability to capture his narrator's voice along with deftly interweaving humor into every scene. It is always a pleasure to read his works. Here, especially, he shines as he switches between these four incredibly different narrators with ease. The middle aged woman is as believable as the youthful musician. Compassion is carefully constructed for all four characters--despite their occassionally unsavory activities, there is still a desire to see them do well for themselves.

The book is far from ambitious, however. Rather than constructing characters who are serious about suicide, Hornby's men and women are dabblers, people who are curious, or show-offs, and not those who seriously entertain the idea of death. While this keeps the book from becoming overly morbid, it also prohibits greater exploration. Similarly, each character has one concrete reason for contemplating suicide, many of which are somewhat cliched. Though it is mentioned again and again that characters are depressed, such deep emotion is not displayed through action.

Hornby is a great writer of summer fun. Difficult to imagine reading of four suicidal people as fun, yet Hornby, magically, creates such a book. HIghly recommended for a rainy day or day at the beach--the mood could fit either atmosphere. Crime and Punishment it is not, but A Long Way Down is definitely still worth the read.

-J

Everyone's Allowed a Selfish Moment

And this is mine. So if you're looking for anything interesting, positive, whatever, don't look here. Oh, except for this! I've decided to make this into a book review blog. So I'm going to try very hard to make every other post a book review, starting with the next one that I post. But I will still write about my life, because apparently some people care about that.

So, with that all said, on with the self-indulgence!

Last night I had my farewell barbecue. It was nice, seeing a lot of my friends. Not all of them, of course, since some are in Seattle, or Arkansas, or Grand Rapids, or Africa, or, you know, MADRID. But it was cool. It was like a review of college, with a few people from work, a few from the dorms, a few from rugby, and then, of course, the necessary contingent from St. Mary's.

As Brian (P., who apparently has dubbed himself #2. . .No comment from me on that) pointed out, it was impossible to really feel sad, or cathartic. I can't imagine not being friends with some of those people. It's impossible to imagine a world where I can't walk down the street and see my friends, or go bother Al in her room with hyperactive speech, or wave at Mike as he comes by every day. Hee.

So I didn't feel sad, i just couldn't. ANd I tried, I really did, but it just doesn't work that way. It's the next stage in life, and i these relationships are really important enough, I'll maintain them. I mean, I'm still good friends with people from high school, and I only see them a few times every year. No, it's not the same, but it's just. . .different, not worse. And besides, this will happen to everyone next year. Ha. Look forward to it, punks!

And Alanna, I am fully capable of Top Ten Lists, as proven by my Top Ten Favorite Things only a few days ago. I just gave up on the Office one because. . .it wasn't really a top ten list, it was just covering all the characters I like. So nyah. But, to prove you wrong further, here is a top ten list of people I will miss next year, in no particular order. ANd I"ll probably forget someone who deserves to be in the top ten, so if you're forgotten. . .I am sorry. It doesn't mean you don't belong there.

1. Alison. (She's picked first because I can see her). Al has been my sounding board for many years. She has acquired an amazing skill at understanding what I say, even when the words are frighteningly mushed together, made up, or just not. . .real. . .sentences. . .I don't even know what I'm saying. SHe even manages to nod at hte right places and avoid a glazed over look. AMAZING!!! However, I know that AL and I will have at LEAST one more conversation in life: When the seventh Harry Potter book comes out and I call her to gloat over Ron's death.

2. Lydia. (She's picked second because yesterday I told her that I missed her). Lydia is one of my favorite all-time people. And she got me a card for my going away, that made me laugh and giggle. The CHihuahua said Adios. It was terrific. Also, Lydia manages to be the most optimistic pessimist that I know. Figure that one out, holla yeah. Also, Lyds always joined me on English major exclamations, and we could discuss random theory and semantics for many minutes. We enjoyed great geekdom together, along with a healthy fear of Ralph Williams' hands.

3. Brian P. (Picked third because we talked about not missing people last night. And, officially, from this point on I will no longer say WHY I chose the order I did). Brian, I didn't like when I first met him. And now I adore him. Bizarre? Perhaps. I will miss Brian because with nobody else could I go from silly jokes and laughter to an in-depth religious conversation. He understands the need for justice in the world, and one of the best listeners. And he looks really good with a beard. I don't have many friends that I can say that about, and I will be sorry to not see that beautiful black stubble on a weekly basis.

4. The East Quad Captain Staff. Perhaps I should divide them into individual people, but because I often see them as a unit, I do not feel like losing the space. I only really befriended them as more than mere coworkers this year, but I'm so glad that I did. They are amazing people, full of warmth, ambition, and ridiculous tolerances for alcohol. I couldn't have chosen better people to work with. Well, maybe I could have, but that would have taken time and effort, instead of just me falling in with terrif people.

5. Alanna. Alanna belongs in Slytherin. Sorry, I had to slam that up there right away, because, let's face it, she does. But that is not the reason I will miss her. I will miss ALanna because she is the only person in the world that I can have a serious argument with, and then still love her after it. No bad feelings. . .bitch bitch, yell, yell, hug, kiss, love. That's the best way to be with anyone, but usually people just get offended when I tell them they're wrong and stupid. Plus, ALanna was always up for anything. Now I will have to find another fearless psycopath to hang around with. Not as easy as it sounds.

6. Jen. I have chosen Jen to be my mini-me. I can laugh for hours with her, but then there's also a great depth to her, her dedication to social justice and her Christian attitude. My friendship with Jen will never end--I know this, because we are going to form a new order of nuns. I forget what they're called, but they will be amazing. And priests, not nuns, so I got that part wrong. Plus, she let me cut her hair. You know it's a true friendship when you're allowed to cut someone's hair.

7. Brian (#3? 4? I gave up on numbers so long ago!) Brian was one of my first friends here, and hopefully he will be one of the last (does that make sense? I don't even know). During the second part of the year especially we didn't get to hang out as much as I would have liked, but as we know, distance makes the heart grow fonder. Or absence does. Or something. Anyway, I will miss him, but I kind of already do, so I'm not sure that counts. Whatever.

Whew. Pause. THis is hard work! Only three more people. . .difficult. difficult. . .alright, stretch, stand, stretch. . .hey, am I allowed to put down Sawyer? Or John Krasinski? 'Cuz they won't be back for months. No? Bummer. Family?

8. My family. Yes, it's six people (and yes, I'm counting the dog) Bite me. It's crazy to think that after next week I might not see my brothers until Christmas. Will I come home for THanksgiving? Won't I? I just don't know. Regardless, there's not that guarantee anymore. Both of my parents are agreeing to travel (Mom's going to China to lecture about new therapy techniques and Dad's off to Afganistan. Again. I DON'T KNOW WHY, DON't ASK!!!) so I can't even just pop home and know they're there and will want to hang out with me. Sigh.

9. Andrew. Andrew makes me laugh. and he gives good hugs. And he lets me play Guitar Hero for many, many minutes (aka hours). One of the most good-natured people I know, it's hard to imagine a world without his smiling, laughing face. Though, I don't think I will regret missing the poking. No poking. . .good.

10. The boys/Gen. SHUT UP. I CAN'T DECIDE!! I'm already skipping half a dozen people. Anyway, JoeChrisMikevieve are among my favorite people on earth. I am not going to elucidate more, becuase I think I"m getting carpal tunnel. Can you get that with one post? I think so. I think I"ve got it. I still have JOe's shirt. Maybe I will sleep in it, and smell his essence (I will call it Eau du Joe) and then I will not be as lonesome.

PHEW. DONE. I probably forgot people. Whatever. I guess that I am really bad at Top Ten Lists. Oh well.

Coming soon: Review of Nicolas Hornby. I haven't decided whether I"ll do "Long Way Down" or "About a Boy" or "High Fidelity". Maybe I'll stick'em all together. How does that sound?

-J

Why I Must Find a Menial Paper-Shuffling Job

. . .at Dunder-Mifflin.

Well, it was a valiant effort to complete the first two seasons of The Office in one night, but alas, I fell short of the task. Nonetheless, in the joyous hours of a humid Michigan day, I have little doubt that I can accomplish the goal. So, because I apparently love lists, top ten reasons why everyone should watch the office.

1. Jim. Jim is adorable. Jim is cute. Jim is the kind of guy that you would have a blast on a date with, and still want to take home to your mom. And then you'd want to take him back to your home. Also, Jim is funny. Basically, Jim is perfect, even though his job sucks. Jim is a pleasure to watch. I heart Jim.

2. Phyllis. Phyllis is my second favorite character. Shy, sweet, matronly, and easily one of the funniest characters on the show, PHyllis can go from "Busiest Beaver" to "are you calling me a ho?" in four seconds flat. She plays basketball! She knits oven mitts! And she is married to Bob Vance, Vance Refridgeration. Phyllis rocks the house, and my life.

3. Homoerotic overtones in a show with a homosexual character. Yes, Michael G. Scott has an eerie man-crush on Ryan. And it's awkward, and I feel bad for Ryan (voted Hottest in the Office! Invited to come "clean off" Michael at all hours! THe man with whom Michael would definitely have sex!). This apparent gay-bashing is off-set by the presence of Oscar. . .an actual gay man, who is subdued, calm, and rocks the world.

4. Toby. I am coming to recognize that this is not a list so much of reasons to watch the showas it is a list of my favorite charactesr. Which, I suppose, is the primary reason TO watch the show. The characters are amazing, touching, eccentric, and adorable. Especially Toby. And Jim. And Dwight, strangely enough. And Pam. And Kevin. Not Creed, though. Never Creed.

So, for those of you who have never seen The Office, get your fat butts off--er, ON the couch and watch it! 'Tis fun, 'tis pleasant, 'tis a wonderful bonding experience not likely to be forgotten!

J

An Anti-Rant

Because I've been posting too many angry socialist things lately, here is:
An ANTI-RANT!
aka, listing of things that make me happy. ALWAYS.

1. The Office. This show = amazing. The uber short scenes make it incredibly enjoyable to watch, and the characters mix well together. Unless your favorite character is someone really obscure (ie, Todd Packer) you'll get to see him every day. Furthermore, every character has so much heart to him/her, it's hard not to fall at least a little bit in love.

2. What Not To Wear/How Do I Look/Extreme Makeover/every other makeover show ever made. Okay, seriously. What girl doesn't dream of gettin 5,000 and have a personal stylist tell her what makes her look hot, and what doesn't? Let's be realistic here.

3. Shoes. Though I have not bought any for many months. Oh, shoes. . .

4. Orlando Bloom at the end of Pirates III. Drool. May I reiterate: drool.

5. I bought shoes five weeks ago.

6. Phone calls at midnight from old friends that I used to be wildly in love with. Okay, not wild, and not in love, but let's just say: a great affection existed.

7. Finally being able to see the one, cheesy episode of Charmed I've always wanted to see. Don't judge me!

8. My dream last night was about books. No, seriously, that was it. I was setting up a Bed & Breakfast with Satan (Milton's Satan--if you don't know, don't ask) and I was in charge of decour. Upstairs was this huge, beautiful, worn old bookcase that held--get this--750 books! Gasp! I had Satan carry it down for me (Talk about a turnon) and then went out and bought three more bookshelves, claiming that "an adequete library is necessary for an effective ambience in a B&B" and then spent the rest of the dream organizing the bookshelves by genre and author. AMAZING. There was also the hint that Satan and I were more than just business associates. He brought me green tea with honey at one point, which was a bit odd, but sweet all the same.

9. The Witch Story. Few of you know what this is. The world is better this way.

10. PIctures of my friends in Europe. Oh Europe, where have you gone? THat's right, you haven't moved, I just haven't either. Pity.

And that is all for today! I continue to look for a job, and to avoid being a homeless person. Not that there's anythign wrong with being homeless. . .except that I like to have a bed.

-J

All I Want for Christmas

What a great song. Too bad it's

IMPOSSIBLE.

Sorry. Prepare thineselves for a rant to end all rants on the most random of all random topics: TEETH. And dental care. Which PISSES ME OFF.

Guess how much, total, it cost to fix my teeth after knocking them out? This is two teeth, keep in mind, not a million, nor a thousand, nay, not even a mere hundred. Two. This includes an initial trip to the dentist (to stick them in my mouth), a secondary visit (to take off the braces), a root canal from the friendly neighborhood endodontist (graduated from UM, woot) and a final visit to the dentist for two fillings.

Well, I actually don't know for sure, because insurance covered 80% of the costs at all sites. What did I pay? Close to a $1000. Now, I've never been good with math, but if 1000 is 20%, then I'm pretty sure that other 80 comes out to an exhorbitant amount.

Who can afford that????

Answer: Affluent, suburban families. I now understand, better than ever, why so many of the homeless and impoverished suffer from poor teeth. A regular visit to the dentist is 80+, something which many can't afford. Let alone any filling, plug, drill, etc. etc. It's obscene!

And it's dangerous. Two weeks ago a 12 yr old boy died in Ann Arbor because he had an untreated cavity. His family couldn't afford routine dentist trips, and he seemed healthy. Then, abruptly, he grew incredibly sick, fever, etc. and they took him to the ER wher it was discovered that an infection caused by the cavity had gotten into his bloodstream and eventually to his brain.

That is not acceptable. That is not fair.

Do you know how most people in the world treat decaying teeth? Pulling them out, hoping that the root comes with, and thus avoids a potential life-threatening infection. No teeth are better than death, I suppose, but that's just ridiculous.

Granted, the dentist pays to keep the practice open, to pay all employees, to keep up-to-date on techniques, procedures, and equipment. THe price is still too much. My dentist's office has satellite tv. Cut it. He gets paid bookoo bucks. Cut it. Fifteen magazine subscriptions. Cut them.

NOBODY should ever die because of poor dental work. NOBODY should be forced to pull out a tooth because he/she can't afford treatment. Why are the homeless obsessed with white bread, forgoing the more positive calories in multi-grains and wheats? Because, quite simply, they don't have the strength in teeth (or the teeth period) to chew anything. And that is wrong.

Imagine getting a job with no front teeth. Yeah, probably not going to happen.

Well, anyway, that's my rant for the night. In other news:

Pirates of the Carribbean in one minute:

Where's Johnny Depp? There he is. And there. And there. WHEEE!! Best movie ever! Geoffrey Rush is my lovah. Why is Keira Knightley fighting people? WHat, pirates meet in a conclave? Who's on whose side? WTF is going on? Keira's a pirate king? WTF? NOrrington! Norrington = hot! NOrrington is talking about. . .honor? WHAT HAPPENED TO MY LOVE? He died. Tragic. AWESOME SWORDFIGHT/MARRIAGE. BEST MOVIE EVER! Oh, suspense, will Johnny sacrifice eternity to save Orlando? Answer: yes. So NOT surprised. But wait. . .undead Orlando = UBER HOT. = Better than NOrrington! HOller. What? Setup for a fourth? NOOOOO. Shit.

And. . .that is all she wrote.
Oh, the Office rocks my balls, and I am mildly in love with John Krasinski. And Garrett Hedlund.

Sunshine and Summertime

Actually. . .not so much sun, and definitely doesn't feel much like summer at this particular moment.

Just biding my time until I jet off to NYC. THings are falling into place so nicely now. My mother asked me, when I went home, whether this kind of feels like it was destined to be--that something which once seemed to difficult is now falling into place so nicely. My response to her:

THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS DESTINY!!!

Which I firmly believe, although I'll admit that at times like this, it does seem like life is a big puzzle. But that's a frightening thought, because it means the picture is already decided. One thing I would like to point out, however: as a human with very little patience, when completing puzzles I sometimes get frustrated. And you know what: it is possible to fit the wrong pieces into holes, and when they don't fit, you can always cut off corners. Yes, I have done this. So even if there is a "right path of life" I would just like to point out that one doesn't have to take it. Sure, the picture might not be as pretty in the end, but it's just as complete for all of that.

Thank you.

On a completely different note, Lost had an AMAZING season finale last night, though I was able to predict a large portion of it--mildly disappointing in that aspect, but incredibly engaging and risky, proving yet again that for all its faults, it is still far and away the most ambitious television programming available to view at this point in time. Plus. . . Sawyer is really freaking hot.

Much writing has been going, and the witch story is quickly reaching epic proportions. Which, yes, is kind of tragic in its own way.

The twins graduated from high school. This frightens me. More frightening: Brian is going to Japan. Brian, the most uncultured, disrespectful, foreign country-hating person that I know. Woe upon all of the little Asians--I pity them.

And. . .Pirates came out yesterday. Perhaps I will go see it over the weekend. After all, nothing like a good sight of Johnny Depp to beat out the rainy day blues.

J

Nothing Much to Say. . .

But I'll say it anyway.

Basically, I just wanted to alert all of you (ahem, ahem, Ames) that I've added a link to my personal "website" (ie, easy drag and drop Geocities account) which contains a decent assortment of my writings.

And, to sweeten the deal for those of you who knew me way back when in my girlhood days of high school, I've added the firs chapter of The Witch Story Redux. I always said that I wanted to go back and rewrite that as a decent story. Operative word being decent, take that with a grain of salt.

And. . .that's it! I shall now off myself to clean the kitchen. And when I say off, I don't mean kill myself, I just mean move my fat arse.

Toodles!

Now I Understand Those Movie Star Women

So a rather frightening thing happened to me last night. I was at the shelter volunteering, when the manager pulled me aside. Normally a calm woman who doesn't give a rat's ass about volunteers, she had a look on her face that screamed "law suit."

She brought me to her office and informed me that a hispanic man had just been exited from the program. She informed me that he'd been aggressive toward clients and inappropriate toward staff and volunteers, and enough complaints had been registered against him that he had to leave. She then continued to tell me that one of hte final straws had been Monday, when I'd been monitoring his floor. There had been an incident in a bathroom in which he told another man to keep his eyes off of me. While there was no violence while I was on the floor, it came to blows a few hours later.

In conclusion, I, of course, had no idea that the man considered me his personal property, and in all reality had never behaved inappropriately toward me. We spoke in Spanish, and discussed books, all completely innocent, while the other man enjoyed showing me pictures of his daughters. Once again, innocent.

It's surprising, sometimes, the way perception changes a situation. Something that I found harmless someone else took quite personally. I feel for the man who was exited, but his behavior was overly aggressive, and I am not surprised that he was asked to leave. I'm just surprised that I was a factor in it.

Is this how those women on tv and movies feel when men start fighting over them? Granted, in the Hollywood case they are always big, beautiful, nearly-perfect men, and there is true emotion existing between the three, but noneheless, I feel like the foundational feelings would be the same; confusion, disbelief, and a bit of anger that men consider fighting between THEMSELVES a way to resolve a situation involving another person.

I don't belong to anyone, and while there is a certain romance to a man fighting for (over) you, it's also incredibly demeaning. My life is my own, thank you very much, and I think I will have a slightly different viewing on love triangles in the future. Fighting for affection is not something that can be done with fists or angry words.

Regardless, that is how life in the shelter can occassionally be incredibly interesting and provide wonderful insights and annecdotes for my writings. It will be interesting to see how I fit this one in.

In other news. . .this whole New York thing is hard! I want to quit. And nobody wants to be my endocrinologist and give me a root canal. Seriously! I'm willing to pay, shouldn't that be enough?

All of my love and cookies,
Jess

Tips to Becoming a New Yorker

Actually, I have no tips. All that I know is that I'd better pick some up, because in a little over a month I will be an official resident of New York City, New York State.

In other news, my summer reading goals have already fallen through. I went home and forgot my frustrating Pynchon here in A2, which resulted in me beginning to reread some of my old, favorite science fiction/fantasy books. . .many of which features similar characters on similar quests with very little in the way of innovation.

HOWEVER. I have now rededicated myself to reading the Robert Jordan series, which, for those of you who knew me in middle school, has long been a vexing challenge. It is not particularly difficult to read, it's just loooong. And occassionally badly written. So why I waste my time on it, I know not.

Anyway, time to unpack, research New York, and get out into the beautiful sunshine that is assailnig the world today!

Calling All Music Lovers!

I give up. Computers are impossible to understand.

In other words: I am clearly incompetent and unable to correctly download all of my music to iTunes. I've gotten the majority of it (joy!) but my computer absolutely refuses to recognize a few files, so if anybody out there has copies of the following CDs, please let me know! I absolutely do NOT want to pay for them all again, though I will if I must. I'm not putting out stuff I just want--only that which has been lost to me through the evils of technology!

Snow Patrol
The Fray: How to Save a Life
The Decemberists: Crane Wife
The Dixie Chicks: Home

In other news, I am all alone in my house (stalkers welcome) and it is the single most liberating feeling ever. FUrthermore, it is cold. Furthermore, my room is cleaner than it has been since I moved in, and I fully plan on moving on to the living room next, only to end with the kitchen.

I have nothing else even remotely interesting to say, unfortunately. I'm organizing my word files now, so hopefully I can get back to my writing tomorrow. Also, coming soon: my professional review of Gravity's Rainbow. Yes, I am terrified.

Shaking in my Espadrilles

I got my new computer yesterday! Hurray! In a comic twist, I posted about wanting my new computer available when I got home and then, when I opened the door, what was waiting for me but a new computer? Hurray!

In other news, today I was accepted to the New York Teaching Fellows! Hurray! THe program accepted 12% of its applicants this year, so I feel very special. I was chosen to teach Spanish, which could be problematic with the whole being unable to roll my rrrs thing. Hmmm.

It seems like a terrific program. I teach a regular shift, receiving a regular teacher's salary of about $43,000. Meanwhile, the program subsidizes Master's classes at Syracuse. Not bad. And yet, it requires me to live in scary NYC, far from everyone I know, to begin in mid-June, to take a lot of classes and is overall completely terrifying.

My other option? The completely unterrifying and somewhat comfortable Jesuit Volunteer Corps, where I would work in a minimally difficult job and focus on spirituality. It would be a nice little segue between college and the future, and if I could be absolutely certain that I would be accepted to the NYCTF the following year, I would take it in a heartbeat. But there's no guarantee of that, so I'm stuck in this position of recognizing that this could be the opportunity of a lifetime and feeling like either way I go will have a huge impact on what I do for the rest of my life.

I wish I had a guardian angel who would just tell me what to do. Wouldn't that be marvelous? What I have instead are a series of parents who are concerned primarily for my financial well-being, and a group of friends who don't really understand what it's like to be in this position (no offense). I guess what I need to decide is what I really want to get out of next year, and what I want to get out of my life. Do I want to teach? Do I want to live in New York?

Ooh boy, questions too big for my little head. ON the other hand, if I take the New YOrk opportunity, I don't have to really find a job for the summer. Hmmmm

Nearing the End

You can learn a lot about a person by the way he says good-bye. Which is a kind of pointless observation, because by the time people are saying good-bye, there is no longer the opportunity to get to know them better. Nonetheless, just thought I'd throw it out there.

As people are leaving for the summer and moving away, good-byes are more freqent (hello, Captain Obvious) but there's a strange feeling of fakery to these farewells. Because I'm not moving anywhere, it doesn't seem real for me, so I say good-bye with a smile and a wave, while I'm met with tears and hugs.

Here's the honest truth: no matter how much I care about a person, and enjoy being in his company, I probably won't miss him for more than a week. There. I said it. I am fully prepared for the onslaught of distress. But let's be truthful; people are in a large supply in this world, and it's easy to replace one friend with another. Not another the same, and not to hold the same place in the heart, but for confiding, joking, and passing time with.

Well, that was a rather callous entry, wasn't it? I owe it to the largely empty and odd-smelling ResComp. HEre's hoping (but doubting) that my new computer is waiting for me at home.

I hate making decisions, I hate when things don't work, and I really hate pressure. There. Glad that's out in the open. In other news, I can't wait for May, for there to finally be nothing happening. I can't wait for my new computer, to get back to writing. I've decided to move my coffeepot into my room, and every morning I will wake up, make a cup of coffee, and then sit out on the roof to write, as dawn creeps over the trees. it sounds romantic. Mostly it will probably just be cold, mildly frightening, and highly illegal.

As I feel that any blog must have some edification value, I have decided that mine will be this: to help bring literature to the masses by reviewing at least a book a week. Perhaps I will choose a particular day to do so. If so, that day will be today. A Friday. Friday's are wonderful days. I will call it. . .Fiction Friday. Of course, it could occassionally be delayed until Monday, which would make it. . .Mandatory Reading Monday. Or Tuesday/Thursday in which case, I shall name it. . .Tuesday's To-Reads. Wednesday would become. . .Wordy Wednesday.

Book of the Week: The Plot Against America by Phillip Roth. Ever a counter-culture writer (think Portnoy's Complaint. . .an entire book written as a frighteningly detailed ode to masturbation), Roth's alternate history paints a world in which Roosevelt was never elected to the third term, losing instead to the hugely conservative Charles A. Lindbergh (yes, that Lindbergh, more well known for flying across an ocean than any political activism) who ultimately allies with Nazi Germany and creates an environment in which any American Jew lives in an oppressive state.

What makes the book readable is its utter lack of pretentiousness. Narrated by a young stamp-collector, the book meanders through its themes with the guilelessness only a child can manage. Sympathetic yet flawed characters provide the backbone of the novel, as Newark New Jersey, set between the bustling New York and the politically charged capital provides a bulwark of safe, New England life on the verge of change.

An excellent book for summer reading, with decently spaced chapters, simple language, and a plot bordering between terrifying and thrilling, it's one of those rare discoveries that combines immense readability with literary significance. This is no Invisible Man or Middlesex, but it is a contribution to the American genre in its own right.

And, as a closing comment (from me the self-obsessed narcissist, no longer literary critic) last night, for those of you who missed it, was lesbian night. It involved a friend's boobs, a buttless waiter, and the delightful movie Grindhouse. For those fellow aficionados of zombie films, Rodriguez's Planet Terror was a delight. Imagine watching a video game being played by a friend. The experience was oddly akin to that, with the joy of adding in Bruce Willis, the ever-beautiful Naveen Andrews, Rose McGowan with a frickin' gun strapped to her leg, and the curiously attractive yet altogether too short Freddy Rodriguez.

For those who like to watch hot girls beat up on creepy seriel killers, Death Proof by Quentin Tarantino allows plenty of chest/boob shots for any male viewer. For me, it was a bit long.

And on that note, I have a completely free weekend and absolutely nothing to do. Suggestions?

Hearts and Daisies,
Jess

Summer Reading

In the interest of non-intervention, I will ignore intersibling rivalry, questions of social concern, monetary worries, and the frightening loss of my credit card (don't get too freaked. . .it hasn't been used and I haven't checked all of my pockets just yet). There is some happy news as well: I purchased a new computer today, and it should arrive in 3-5 business days. Hurray for no longer being dependent upon the occassionally funky-smelling ResComp!

So, as the days stretch out before me, with no jobs other than partying hard through the month of May, I find myself with a blissful lack of stress and new deluge of time to spend doing that which i do best: no, not making weird laughing noises, nor stuffing my face, nor even losing things, but rather reading. I completed the first book of summer at 3:15 last night: Atonement, by Ian McEwan.

Let me preface this entry (can it count as a preface if it doesn't arrive until the third paragraph? I see no harm in it) by stating that Ian McEwan is a must-read author for anyone. He writes lyrically and simply, and his words emulate the senses. That being said, he is not a particularly narratively-driven writer--there is no strict plot to his novels, no gradual anticipation building to a climax, but rather a growing unease, a sense of emotional urgency that does not correlate to the actual events of the book. No John Grisham, he, nor even a Nora Roberts, but more of a James Joyce on a meandering stroll through Dublin, with nowhere in particular to head and no sense of direction or destination.

So, yes, I strongly encourage the reading of McEwan. Saturday is a marvelous read for anyone with the desire to truly experience the world post 9/11 in a literary fashion, while Atonement is positively brilliant meta-fiction for anybody interested in that brand of writing.

Up next on my list of summer reading is A Plot Against America by Phillip Roth, Gravity's Rainbow, the short stories of Dubus, Infinite Plan by Allende, and some book by Henry Roth about Jews living in the burroughs of New York. Clearly, these readings will only take me a month, so I welcome any further suggestions of reading material, preferably novels with significance, but not those overwhelmingly difficult to absorb (*cough, Faulkner, *cough).

Similarly, I need to discover a DVD set of television episodes to amuse me on those nights when my lightbulb needs changing and I haven't yet found the time. yet again, all suggestions welcomed and appreciated.

And now. . .I am going to cease procrastinating for the minor amount of studying I must do in regards to my exam this afternoon, and then I am going to go shopping--er, I mean job-hunting.

Much love to my peeps
J

I concede. I need to buy a computer. This is not pleasing in the least, allow me to tell you. After all, computers are complicated machinery. There is RAM and bts and other strange abbreviations and denomers that I cannot even begin to understand.

I miss the days of old technology, that good old stuff that lasts forever. Take the TV in my room. It is older than I am, by an entire year. Sure, sometimes it makes weird noises, and when there isn't a soundtrack playing in the background it supplements with its own irritating buzz, but it still works. Unlike my computer. Which died after a year.

I smell like punch, which makes me think of jungle juice, which makes me feel like I smell like a party. hmm. Speaking of which, I am very jazzed for the month of May, which sounds like it will be one loooong party with all of my similarly jobless friends.

Speaking of which. . .I'm supposed to be looking for a job at the moment. Au revoir, back to the job search.

No Day But Today

Well, that time has finally come. It's hitting me that I just might be graduating this year (imagine that!) and I recognize that communication with people will only get harder and harder. Every stage of life, another person and another land is added on to that vast growing list of people to whom I send Christmas Cards, update on my life, and try to set rumors and gossip straight. The high school friends are worked out, the family receives the email, but now I must add this vast world of college, as well, and church and community.

Thus. . .this blog. Which, perhaps, will be a faithful recording of my life, of what I'm doing, where I plan to go, and what I feel. Perhaps it will become a bookmark for my writings, a way to post things I want read but never published. Maybe it will serve as a candle against the darkness of injustice, a special place to rant about social justice and to plea for solutions. Most likely it will be an unconnected series of ramblings that lead nowhere and explain nothing.

But then, that's what you all expect coming in, isn't it? You know me, and you know that my life is a curious amalgation of things perceived and not, the imagination tied intricately with memory in which what I dream is as real as what I experience, and what I say can be something I believe whole-heartedly or a vague ideal I heard recounted once on a commercial for Campbell's soup (which reminds me. . .I love those commercials for the sleeping pill. You know, the ones with the beaver and Abe Lincoln).

So to conclude this pointless beginning, let it be said. There is no road of life, just an endless series of hurdles, and I, my dear friends, have a pathetic tendency to run into them head-on. But bruises build character, and let's admit it. . .it's just plain old funny when those people fall down.